top of page

Calm & In Control

The spiritual path to freedom from anxiety

My Letter to You

I know firsthand what it feels like to carry anxiety.

 

When you know that the thoughts are destructive and the fears are irrational, but still there's a feeling that you can't ignore, desperately trying to warn you that something is wrong. When you're stuck, unsure of what to do or how to cope with it. When overwhelm kicks in and you become paralysed. When it seems like there is no alternative but to give into the anxiety. Maybe you've even tried some mindfulness or CBT but with little or no results. No matter what you do, the anxiety comes back seemingly even stronger than before.

​

I know this place. And I know what it feels like to move out of it. 

​

Over the last 10 years I have been collecting skills and techniques for the mind, body and spirit. I have worked with anxiety, depression, intrusive thoughts, OCD, disordered eating and somatic symptoms such as physical pain, panic attacks, vomiting, fatigue and fainting. 

​

I have learned the secrets to tackling anxiety and it feels important to me that I share them - that is why I have written this course. In three months, I aim to equip you with the necessary tools to overcome your anxiety and embrace a life of freedom, power and calm. So you can sit in the driver's seat of your mind and take back control of your life. I truly believe that given the tools, anyone can learn to harness their thoughts and live a life of confidence and calm​​

​​

There is a rich and expansive life beyond anxiety. It is meant for you. 

About Me

My name is Lila Tristram

Raised by a psychotherapist, I came to appreciate the therapeutic arts at quite a young age. My mother was like a superhero to me. She was so passionate about her work and shared so much knowledge with me about how the human mind works. How therapy leads to real, tangible change. I saw in my mother hope for people who had been told that their situation was hopeless. Very early on in my life I understood what healing looked like.

With my aspiration in life to be an artist, as an adult I moved to London to undertake a degree in classical music. When I play music, I sometimes get the sense that my mind has surrendered, and together we are observing my body acting on my behalf. I have seen my fingers slide into the perfect position on the fretboard far before my mind has caught up with them, almost as if the hand is channelling, acquiring a piece of music that was already written but just needed someone to express it. In studying music I learned about spirituality.

 

I am trained as a yoga teacher and have had a daily yoga practice for nine years now. Yoga has taught me about the power of the body-mind connection (there really is no separation) and how in training one, you train the other. Yoga taught me about deep relaxation and the power of the breath.

 

While I knew that my life would always in some respect be in pursuit of music, creative lives are notorious for being financially inconsistent, so I found myself taking up a job in a school for children with physical and mental health issues. In this role I saw children suffering with debilitating anxiety, depression, suicidal ideation, self-harming, eating disorders and also physical illnesses which left them with long standing symptoms such as chronic fatigue. While I was there to teach, for many of my students I fell into a role of mentor, and there I witnessed some seismic transformations. I saw energy return to children suffering for years with chronic fatigue, students with anxiety rendering them housebound returning to the classroom, and students who’s academic results were a lost cause getting straight As across the board. These children taught me about the power of faith and of friendship. 


Following that job, I trained in the therapeutic technique of ‘Parts Work’. This encompasses Voice Dialogue and IFS and is a remarkable technique which involves viewing the psyche as being made up of multiple ‘parts’. When parts of ourselves act in conflict with one another, we enter a state of inner turmoil which can affect all aspects of our lives. The task is to heal this internal conflict. Parts Work taught me about the depth and beauty of the human mind.

 

In my personal life, I have overcome several psychological afflictions including intrusive thoughts, OCD, anxiety, depression, disordered eating and somatic symptoms in the form of physical pain, panic attacks, vomiting, fatigue and fainting. Over the last ten years I have collected so many skills for the body, mind and creative spirit. I have used them with others and used them myself.  I have never known them not to garner results. 

Course Values

This Course is for You If...

1 / You are living with ...

Anxiety, depression, OCD, intrusive thoughts, panic attacks, grief, ADHD, disordered eating, somatic symptoms (where anxiety presents in the body e.g. fainting, vomiting, exhaustion or muscle pain when stressed), addiction, insomnia, low self-esteem, creative blocks, hopelessness, volatile or low mood, lack of direction / life purpose

2 / Nothing has worked ...

Maybe you have tried CBT, mindfulness or counselling in the past but nothing seems to have worked. Perhaps you've been sat on an NHS waiting list for so long that you've had to find your own coping mechanisms. Or perhaps you've had a negative experience of therapy which has put you off the whole idea. Perhaps your GP has offered medication for your mental health which you're feeling hesitant about. Maybe you've tried that too with mixed results...

3 / Traditional Therapy Seems ... 

Daunting. You don't know where to start, which style to try, how long it might go on for. If it seems like a financial cost that you won't be able to sustain. If you can't imagine yourself bearing your soul to a stranger. You're worried that you might be humiliated or you just can't face talking about "it". 

4 / You've Been Looking For ...

A way of liberating yourself from anxiety which doesn't involve an open-ended time and money commitment. Guidance from someone who has openly been in your shoes. A way of understanding what's actually going on, not just coping mechanisms to "manage" it. A solution which doesn't require you to talk too much or say anything you don't feel comfortable with. To be able to talk freely to someone who really gets what you're going through. To work with someone who continues to pursue their own creative dreams. To understand yourself on a deep level and learn how to face your greatest fears with courage and confidence.

The Secret ...

Anxiety just energy that gets to be transformed. It is never random. You are an intelligent child of the universe and your higher mind has something to say.  Find someone who respects your anxiety. Who knows how to talk to it, who understands its language. With the right companion by your side, you can face up to your shadow and watch as your life falls back into place. 
 

Expect ... 

Self compassion, self confidence, clarity, calm, deep relaxation, higher creativity, reaching your goals, increased bandwidth for joy and success, greater intimacy in relationships, insights, passion, breakthroughs, self-awareness, curiosity, courage, connection, appreciation of life, appetite for life

Join Me

If you are interested in starting your own Calm and In Control journey, please fill in the application form below.  In the interests of ethicacy, I only work with those who I truly believe I can help. Following your application I will invite you to a video call with me and you will only enrol if we both feel that this course is the correct next step for you. If not, I will direct you to other options which I feel would be better suited for you at this time.

Thank you for your application

bottom of page